Good Evening. (...or morning...late afternoon, wide-eyed can't sleep 4am?)
I had another disability experience this week I thought I'd share. Recently, I had a filling fall out of one of my teeth. Being one of the many dentally uninsured Americans (luckily without pain) I did not seek immediate care. Instead, I estimated about how long a steady diet of Froot Loops can last without an exposed tooth requiring a root canal...
after determining that 9 months was probably a bit too long to wait for an appointment with the OSU dental students (if you agree to "guinea pig" it you get a cheaper fee), i relied on a friend for a referral to a local dentist.
when i arrived for my first appointment this Tuesday. there were two orange barrels strewn with yellow CAUTION tape blocking the door. maybe i should have taken this as some sort of guardian angel's effort but i didn't. instead i simply approached the closet man in a hardhat and asked for a safe or alternative entrance into the building...
once inside the building, i found the floors had been stripped of the tile and provided a paved path of industrial glue residue anywhere carpet might have been.
after some wandering, I found my way to the dentist's door. i am not sure of all the other services offered in this building (accounting, real estate, law???) but i assure you there were many.
my stay in the waiting room area was no Comfort Inn but it served. after checking in at the desk, i sat down in a fabric covered waiting chair and slept... i am embarrassed about this but also realize there's not much you can do to fight sleep in the 'bewitching" hours. Those late afternoon hours between 3-5pm, that our neighbors to the South have so wisely called "siesta!"
the dental assistant opened the waiting room door, called my name off the clipboard and i jumped!!!!! awake!!!!
i am not steady on my feet after any kind of nap and especially start off in all directions when my legs have tightened from sitting (and sleeping) too long in a chair. i tried to follow the assistant through the maze of hallways and side offices...but instead ended up banging into almost every door frame and available wall space. Finally, i entered one of the offices and landed it safely in the dental chair...
okay all this was NOT the problem that has prompted me to write this tonight. the problem was what happened next. as i reclined and watched CNN on the TV monitor hanging above...i did not fall asleep...go figure...the dental hygienist entered the room. i was smiling and taking in a fine head of silver hair and a great floral smock when she looked at me. squinted through dark rimmed glasses and said "so, what is it? i see you had a problem getting in here today."
she looked at me expectantly there was not a hint of awkward apology in her voice.
i inherently lost mine because i knew what she meant. she was not referring to the many physical or man-made barriers i had just overcome but was rather just seeing me--A BIG FAT DISABILITY!
i blinked back tears or you know, just the dust in my eye from all the construction and gave her the obvious. "Yes" i said, "i have trouble walking..." the rest she was going to have to pry out of me with her little pointy scraper hook!
in the end we both ended up smiling and having a nice conversation between rinse and spit. i left with this realization a hard lesson to learn for someone who strives to give so much...
realization: just because i have a SCI this does not mean i have to explain myself to anyone who asks or feels entitled to a good story.
okay, hope you all have a great night, morning, or finally heavy eyelids so you can get some sleep.
amanda
