Reeve Foundation Paralysis Community

I guess maybe I just need to vent, but I am feeling very hopeless and sick and tired of how long just about everything takes to happen.  I have been home from rehab now for 9 months, seems a lot longer. I still have difficulty transferring into a car, probably due to being a larger person. I can go downhill or even surface without much trouble, but going uphill is a different story. I have been in a car 3 times since my accident in February 2008! Our family church is going to purchase a vehicle for me, which is great, but everything leading up to the driving is one big long trial. Getting to where they evaluate you to see if you are able to take hand control driving classes, was difficult and having to transfer 3 times and almost going on the parking lot was embarrassing. Well meaning people coming by asking "Can you stand at all?"  HELLO, if I could would I be struggling using this little board? I passed the eval so I get to go and stay at a hotel for 3 nights and take classes then go to the BMV for testing. More transferring, how high are the beds at the hotel? Will I be able to make it if they are too high? My doctor had to fill out a form to send in to the BMV and they sent me a copy and he checked that I would need re-evaluated yearly, is this the norm? Somehow I guess I didn't think I would need to be checked all of the time, I didn't after I passed my other drivers test, and I am not having any forgetfulness or other reasons for concern. Of course I need new glasses for my drivers exam test. I always wore contacts that were disposed of somewhere after my wreck and can see well enough for most things that I never felt the need to do anything, but I need them to pass the test. Where can I get to on and the city bus, and nowhere nearby takes medicare So I will have to pay out of pocket, alright it will be worth it in the end. Can I stay in my chair, of course not, how high is the exam chair and does it move? I will find out for sure next week when I get there I guess. I signed up to go to an out patient rehab in Cinncinati that gives you a free week to try all of the latest equipment. YEAH, everything is a go. But, they have a hard time finding transportation for people that need a lift, and my transportation to get there now isn't sure they can take me. Having to get in to see a urologist is in another level of complaining, have to take the bus which only runs to my area  from 10-3, so to make sure I can get back home my appointment has to be around 11:30 in the morning. Meanwhile I am having problems, but have to wait 2 months to be seen. I know losing weight and getting stronger are key points and would help with almost everything, but when you are not able to go anywhere to do anything and have to be careful of fluid intake for reasons it is not an easy thing to do. I am trying and I know if I could do anything like most people do it would help. Go to a movie, shopping, just take a drive like I did before so I could feel like a person again instead of a prisoner would be a big help. I just saw how much I have written and I guess I really did need to vent!

DL,

I know this will not make your situation any better, however, I could have written many of your comments over the past three and a half years.  You are doing amazingly well for having been out of rehab for such a short time. 

It is interesting how driving an accessible vehicle differs so much from state to state!!!  I will continue to renew my license every four years without any retesting or change in the usual process.  The only reason I was required to complete a driver evaluation was because of coverage by worker's compensation.  I know a guy who bought a used, converted van on his own and received a 20 minute instruction session on hand controls. 

I think it is so good that you vent your frustrations on this site rather than allowing them to build up over time.  It sounds like you are doing the best that you can do with the resources you have and, hopefully, you will see over time that you are not alone.  I have received some very supportive responses that remind me that I am not alone in this struggle.

I am glad you are being persistent and vocal.  Perhaps sharing your frustrations will help you keep moving forward.  I hope something goes smoothly for you soon.  Keep venting!