Reeve Foundation Paralysis Community

My son had a four wheeler accident 01/01/09 leaving him paralyzed from the chest down. He has his good days and his bad, he has not regained use of his hands which would be a blessing to see him be able to use them again. I am trying to find someone in his condition for him to be able to open-up to and ask questions and so forth. I was thinking if there was someone that lived close enough to him that it would help so much having someone to relate to his problems and give him encouragement. He lives in Elkin, North Carolina. Thank You!

I am so sorry to hear what has happened to your son and the rest of the family. To begin with, I would recommend contacting the North Carolina spinal cord injury Association www.ncscia.org

You never said when his accident was, but it's not unusual for people, especially men, to close down in the immediate aftermath. Not only that, but most 19 year old boys are not the most expressive in the world! You see, we have so many intense and confusing emotions inside that we have never felt before that the only way we know how to deal with them is to shut down.

I was 33 years old when I became a C-5 quadriplegic. Not only was I grown, but I was already a psychologist. So I was able to identify the emotions of terror, feeling out of control, rage at the injustice and indignities I was living with not to mention having a sense of losing my manhood. So I was able to name the emotions and even tell other people what I was feeling. But even at that, I felt that if all of those emotions came out I would fall apart and never be put back together.

You are right about your son -- he needs to be with kindred spirits, with people who understand him and understand what he's going through -- even beyond words. And I would imagine that would also be true about you. He has the paralysis, but you suffer no less than he. I noticed when I looked up the spinal cord injury Association that they have support groups for parents.

Please tell your son you've made contact with us and we understand. And care. And if he would ever like to talk with me through these pages, it would be my great pleasure.

In the meantime, please take care. Please

Dan

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Dan Gottlieb Ph.D.
www.DrDanGottlieb.com
"wisdom of Sam: observations on life from an uncommon child"
trailer:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_V4QrekU1Wk

My name is Ed, I'm 44 years old. and I was born in Richmond, Virginia. I was a Deputy Sheriff for the City of Richmond. On October 15, 2000, I was involved in a vehicle accident that left me a quadriplegic (C5/C6 incomplete). After leaving MCV Hospital, I went to Woodrow Wilson Rehabilitation Center in Fishersville, Virginia. My first stay at WWRC was for six weeks of physical therapy. The second stay at WWRC was for more physical therapy and employment training. I received a certificate in accounting, volunteered as a Peer Mediator, and was elected Student President. While at WWRC I met my future wife Judy. On May 14, 2005, we were married in Henrico, VA.
This is a little bit of my life since my accident. If your son or any of your family members would like to communicate with me, you can email me at rookie992@aol.com.
God Bless,
Ed

Hello My Name is Kourtney. I was in a bike accident almost 5 years ago. I was walking that whole summer no pain. A doctor wanted to schedule me a surgery to make sure my back didnt hunch over. The surgery went bad and he paralized me at about t-8. I do not live close enough to meet face to face but if he has facebook or even on this website I can talk to him through here. I was recently fourwheeling with my cousin and we went racing. I rolled my forwheeler and broke my left arm. Luckily I didnt hurt myself worse. I am 16 now and Still in a wheelchair, My movement has moved down to around a T-12 so I have gained a little bit back. I will pray and hope he gets better or gains his hands back. It may be hard to accept this at first but things do get better. I know it hurts to think this now but everything happens for a reason. I hope this helped a little bit. If you or your son wants to e-mail me you can e-mail me at kourtney.hammett@gmail.com

Dear Mom! We may not be that close (Manassas, Virginia) but I can assure you we are right there with you!! My son Ricky was injured on 7.19.08 and he is a c4/5. He would love to help!
And I would love to talk to you and see if I can help in any way. Your email was basically written with my own words.
I have a doctor's appt right now but I will email you a bit more as soon as I come back.
Hang in there and God bless you, your son and your family
Maria (AKA, Ricky's Mom)

I'm so sorry that your son had this accident, and I know words can never express our sadness, however my husband actually is paralyzed from a motorcylce accident 25 years ago, he was a young man too, only 20, and actually two weeks before his 21st birthday.  My husband and I would love to talk and share our experiences with your son, and let him know that although this happened, there is such a great life ahead of him.  I know it's hard to understand at this time, but trust me, if he gets involved with other kids, he will see his life will be different than it was, but it still can be great!  He has to remember that he is still the same person prior to this accident, his heart and emotions are what makes a person, and that should not change becuase he's sitting in a chair.  I'm not sure if he can feel or not, my husband can't, but both of us would never in a million years change our lives.  We are blessed to have a beautiful life.

I posted this in your other thread--figured I would post here as well. Looks like you have an outpouring of support.

Hi: A friend of mine who is also a C5-6 read about your son and contacted me today. Patrick Rummerfield is an amazing guy and he wants to reach out to your son and to let him know what is possible.

Please call me at the Christopher & Dana Reeve Foundation, Paralysis Resource Center and I will see that your son and Patrick connect.

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Thank you,

Every day I wake up is a good one.
phf 59-08

This is Ricky's Mom again.

I forgot to indicate that my son is 20 years old. He seems to be in the exact same level as your son. He can move his arms but not his wrists and fingers "yet". He also wishes to play xbox and he often says that he wouldn't care about his legs if he could only have the use of his hands.

As you said, my heart breaks every time he says that and make me feel completely helpless!! He also has good and bad days but the good ones have increased significantly!

What is the best way to contact your son? I know it can be difficult for them to write. My son is eager to talk to him.
Please feel free to contact me directly. Perhaps YOU need someone to talk as much as your son!
my email is msheavener77@comcast.net
God Bless your family

hello, my name is Deborah...partial sever C4-C5...fighting everyday to regain life & w/huge successes. SCI recovery is slow, but possible. "Everything Impossible becomes Possible for those who have the Power of Determination."

injury date: 11 October, 2004. Anchorage, Alaska. 7:38am getting into car to go to work, pitch black outside, stabbed 10 times, attempted murder.

i would love to chat with you, if you'd like...we could even do Skype. i've had the most incredible journey these past five and one half years.
write to dubalub@hotmail.com
best wishes & blessings, Deborah

Dan,
Thank you so much for responding. His accident was 01/03/09. He keeps saying "Mom, if I could just get my hands back" and it tears my heart to pieces. It's like every night he prays for something to return and every morning he wakes up with no changes. It is so hard for him to find things to pass the time and there is only so much T.V you can watch before you think you are going to scream! He can use the computer some but he can't feed himself and it is very frustrating for him. I thank you so much!

Donna

Thank you so much! We have fished the Yadkin River and you know small our town is. I just really think if he had someone close to his age, he will be 20 in a few weeks, that he would really open-up. Having somone that is in your situation helps so much and I want him to try harder. Thank you for everything!

Donna

Your message brought tears to my eyes! Thank you so very much!!! His name of course is Teejay and his email is teejaycpr@yahoo.com You have been a Godsend and I appreciate this so much more than you know! My goodness I am all tears right now. He needs someone to encourage him not give up, and their injuries are practically the same! Thank you so very much!

Donna

Thank you so much! It would really help him alot and he needs the support and motivation! I appreciate this so much! His name is Teejay and his email is teejaycpr@yahoo.com God Bless!!!!

Donna

Ed,
Thank you so much! His name is Teejay and his email is teejaycpr@yahoo.com He needs support and motivation so badly! God Bless!!!!

Donna

Thank you for all your help! When I told Teejay that there was someone his age and similar injuries that wanted to talk to him, I could tell he was excited! I sent you his email it's teejaycpr@yahoo.com Thank you again!!!!!!

Donna