Reeve Foundation Paralysis Community

We experience alot of bone headed people when we're out and about of course, but its the positive ones that really make an impression on me.  The idiots I just mentally file into the 'you are an idiot' pile in my head, and move on - people's reactions rarely bother me anymore.  But every now and then there is a neat encounter that happens only because of (your / your loved one's) SCI. 

 

Care to share any?  Doesn't have to be a big thing, just anything.

 

Here's one: we were at the Langley Air Show last weekend and the fence row was absolutely packed for the Blue Angels performance that was to start in about 10 minutes.  We were about 100 feet back, which for seeing the planes was obviously fine, but there was alot of neat stuff up close that you could only see at the fence line.  We were craning our necks to see when a gentleman came up and said "Would you like to move up front?".  We said "yes!" ... and he brought us up to where he and his friends were sitting, they moved their chairs and traded places with us.  It was just so NICE.  And done precisely because my husband is disabled - he didn't pick us out randomly from the crowd.  He didn't make a big deal of it, they all just swapped places with us, they tipped their hats at us (literally, it was soooooooooo loud once it started) and that was that.  It made all of us feel good and we're going to pay it forward. 

 

 

After a night without sleep, a long day of driving through back country (lost!) that can only be described as a comedy routine from Jeff Foxworthy or a scene from the movie "Deliverance" (kept listening for the dualing banjos), I found the motel that I planned to stay in and decided that I could not sleep on the bed linens provided.  This is the only motel for miles and is near the mobility shop that will have my SUV for at least two days while I'm stuck here...So, I headed to a nearby Walmart to pick up something to put on top of the bed to sleep on, buy chlorox wipes, hand sanitizer and fabreze spray.  Today was just one of those Murphy's Laws days...if it could go wrong, it did. 

As I headed into Walmart, I noticed that my battery was getting low.  I whizzed through the store as quickly as possible.  When I returned to my vehicle,  I could barely get up the ramp.  I asked an employee who was gathering shopping carts if he could give my chair a push to help it up the ramp.  He did and checked back in a few minutes to see if everything was ok.  He was the one bright spot in this very, very long and frustrating day!    

Oh man, that is just awful .... after a long day of driving the last thing I want to do is go to the store, and being in a chair it has to be even worse.  I hope that wherever your travels are taking you, that they are less eventful than the ones so far!

I have these encounters almost every day.  My wheelchair seized up while visiting a friend.  She had to mobilize three or four neighbors to push me across the lawn and into my Van.  My friend called an hour later after I got home saying two of the neighbors called her to make sure I got home okay.
Several years ago before GPS I was traveling a dark remote road on my way to give a lecture when the written instructions fell on the floor face down.  I pulled into her destination and a very tough looking young man came out with tattoos, pierces and stuff in places I didn't want to look at.  He came up and saw what was going on and I just asked him if he could tape the directions back up on my dashboard.  He got tape but didn't want to put it where I wanted it because he was afraid I would have to take my eyes off the road.  We talked for several minutes about what would be safest for me.  After I thanked him and pulled out, I looked in the rearview mirror and he was smiling and waving at me.
I don't know who did more for who in these encounters.  We might be enraged or a shame at our vulnerability, but more often than not, vulnerability opens peoples hearts.

---

Dan Gottlieb Ph.D.
www.DrDanGottlieb.com
"wisdom of Sam: observations on life from an uncommon child"will be released April 2010

I agree about the frequency of occurences and kindness of strangers.  I believe that most people are willing to help if they know what to do or you help walk them through what you need.