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Women Who are Divorced

Last post 07-14-2008, 3:29 PM by pyhiG. 6 replies.
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  •  07-04-2008, 4:14 PM 12565

    Women Who are Divorced

    If you don't mind, please share who initiated the divorce and what were the reasons or circumstances of the divorce.  If you were a believer before or after, etc. 

    I'm not divorced but at one point my husband asked me for one.  Yet he wouldn't file.  He actually asked me to file because he didn't know how to go about it...oy!  I separated from him eventually without divorcing him.  I thought about divorce, saw an attorney (who by the way told me that it would be to my advantage to be the one to file) and in the end the Lord convinced me it wasn't the right thing to do & my husband and I reconciled. 

    My Mom divorced my Dad after putting up with 5 years of infedility, drinking & physical abuse.  He checked himself into a clinic for treatment for his alcholism and when he got out he was served with papers.  She was not a believer until a few years after their divorce.

  •  07-05-2008, 8:14 AM 12632 in reply to 12565

    Re: Women Who are Divorced

    Divorced.
    Believer after.
    He filed.

    The reason was infedility he wanted to divorce so he could marry the other woman.  He did and they are still married.  However he has not been completely faithful to her, he had an emotional affair with a girl he knew from highschool.

    My parents divorced after 12 years due to documented/reported abuse.  My dad filed.  My mom was still standing for her marriage.  Both claim to be believers, I know that my dad is today.

    My mother in law divorced after 7 years of marriage because of infedility.  FIL doesn't see the value of being faithful to one woman and its still the case today.  He filed.  MIL is a believer, FIL is not.

    There have been times I have wanted to divorce my husband, not over biblical grounds, what has kept me here is my faith in God, belief in His Word.


    ~~Its me, Jane.
  •  07-05-2008, 11:20 AM 12648 in reply to 12565

    Re: Women Who are Divorced

    Divorce - emotional, verbal abuse (fear of physical), withholding of sex long-term, threat of physical abuse toward child/on the cusp of physical abuse toward child, cussed at me, etc., also refused to come home or let me know where he was going and put me down in private and in front of others. Would also put down or call his children or myself names in front of others or in public...

    Oh yeah, I filed after a two year separation because he was stalking me - harassing me - scaring my neighbors (I almost lost my apartment), and refused to support his child without a legal order. Back then, esp. in that area, you couldn't get child support without suing for a divorce. Things have changed a bit in legislation since then.

    I'm so lost...
  •  07-05-2008, 2:45 PM 12665 in reply to 12648

    Re: Women Who are Divorced

    My ex filed for divorce after he refused to repent or cooperate with pastors/counselors.  He told me that he couldn't change and that he had decided to divorce to set me free of his abusive ways.  He gave up on himself and then sunk into denial about his issues and harrassed me for 1 1/2 years til we settled out of court. A year and a half later he married a foreign woman.

    We both had born-again experiences in our youth, prior to ever meeting each other and marriage.  But when he didn't cooperated in the Matt. 18 process, he is to be regarded like an unbeliever. 

    My ex is a religious abuser and committed abuses of many kinds... escalating over 17 years. I had to separate for my own safety for hours or days at a time. I took the position that divorce is not the answer and I made that clear to him, that healing is a better choice for us and our kids. But unfortunately, he chose the way of a fool.

     

     

  •  07-05-2008, 8:35 PM 12685 in reply to 12665

    Re: Women Who are Divorced

    We are saved

    He chose to file for divorce when I told him we needed to separate.  Divorce was final on December 2004.

    He attempted to reconcile a year ago but I declined seeing his lifestyle unchanged.  He is dating different women all the time.

     I turned down a couple of single men from church trying to ask me out on a date.  There is a godly man I admire (single never married) in his early 40s for about three years now and would like to get to know him, God willing.  He seems to love the Lord and would rather wait for God's chosen mate for him.  I am praying that the Lord will give him the desire of his heart.

    I am peaceful and content in what the Lord is doing in my life right now and please pray for my ex husband to become the father that God wants him to be.

    Thank you all and God bless.

     


    John14:17 That helper is the Spirit of Truth. The world cannot accept him, because it doesn't see or know him. You know him, because he lives with you and will be in you.
    Psalm 34:1
  •  07-14-2008, 1:14 PM 14401 in reply to 12565

    Re: Women Who are Divorced

    BcauseHeLives:

    If you don't mind, please share who initiated the divorce and what were the reasons or circumstances of the divorce.  If you were a believer before or after, etc. 


    I think you know 'em already but for anyone who doesn't know, or who it may help ..

    I initiated the divorce.  I initiated it after 10 years of verbal and physical abuse by my ex, and his flirtations and affairs with other women.  I left him 3 or 4 times, tried to get counseling, tried 'saying the right things', tried just about everything.  Nothing worked for longer than a few weeks.

    My ex and I were both raised Catholic, but neither of us attended church.  I wouldn't say that I was a believer throughout that marriage, or before or after it until 2002, when I became a believer, and have not looked back since.  :)



    I desire to do your will, O my God;
    your law is within my heart. Ps 40:8
  •  07-14-2008, 3:29 PM 14504 in reply to 14401

    Re: Women Who are Divorced

    Jane, if you do not mind, could you tell me how long after your divorce that you started dating again?

    Thanks!


    John14:17 That helper is the Spirit of Truth. The world cannot accept him, because it doesn't see or know him. You know him, because he lives with you and will be in you.
    Psalm 34:1
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