So I've been reading an amazingly insightful book Becoming Heirs Together of the Grace of Life by Jeff and Marge Barth; I have a personal testimony of how the Lord led me immediately all the way to the back corner of a thrift shop store directly to this book in a desperate hour of my marriage but I'll save that for another time. The very next day after that divine encounter at the thrift shop my wife and I received an email out of the blue stating my mother & father in-law wanted to buy us tickets for the Weekend to Remember conference by Focus on the Family. It seems our marriage is on God's radar and I'm thankful.
My question is to mature Christian husbands in this forum that have learned how to channel the tension you feel when your wife speaks to you in a tone that is challenging - especially spiritually challenging?
For example, my wife and I were driving home from a movie tonight discussing two churches we are focusing on to become members of (we recently moved). During our conversation my wife stated, "the first priority of going to church is not to worship God, we can worship God anywhere." While I agreed with the latter part I disagreed that it was not our first priority to which she responded in a challenging tone, "lets see what the Bible has to say about that." Whether either one of us is "right" it is that tone in your wife's voice that says indirectly "your wrong and I'm right" that stirs up tension in a husband that I'm seeking clarity on.
We've had conflicts way worse than this where words were much more sharply spoken but we are trying to grow individually and together into the marriage God wants for us. Which is why I'm posting this thread. I would just like to know a few things you guys do when tension is stirred up. Do you pray? Do you call upon the scriptures...slow to speak, slow to anger, overlook an offense for our glory? I've let other small arguments like this ruin my/our day/weekend before and I'm trying to break out of that cycle of defeat by seeking skills that have been effective for you when dealing with tension stirred up by your wife.
Any words of wisdom would be appreciated.
Thanks!
