Well, watching the "vultures"(brothers)scavaging through my fathers house was almost as painful as the loss of my father itself.
You would never have known that someone had died. Their father, of all people. I saw joy on their faces. So happy with the things they were stuffing quickly into their vehicles. It made me nauseous. It was a job that needed to be done, but it didn't have to be a party. This was my Dads beloved property. His treasures. Well, they deserted me when I so badly needed help caring for Dad. Now they take joy in raiding his house.
Now I understand, people used to tell me, that things can get quite bad after someone dies in regards to property. Thats a understatement.
As I knew he would, Dad took care of me and my future. But because of this, I am now HATED, in a way no one has been hated before.
I don't understand this. I didn't write the will. I didn't care about the will. All I wanted was to keep my father with me and comfortable for as long as possible. And I would give it all back and then some to have him here with me. Don't they appreciate how I looked after their father? I am so mortified, my husband and I are seriously giving thought to moving away to start over. Anyway, one battle ends, and another begins.
Sorry to bore everyone, had to get it off my chest.
Diane

---

Diane
Caregiver of Thomas (my Dad,82)
Pleural epithelial meso
dx 11/10
Our battle ended March 16, 2012. Together.

Diane, nothing can be said to ease the pain, or the terrible sense of betrayal issues like this bring. I know because I've been there twice. Be grateful for the will! In both my cases it was because there was no will. I had to see my daughters shut out with no mementos of their Grandmother. Then I had to see the court catalog & sell a loved ones belongings. Your memories are the true treasures! Those & the knowledge that you were there, in every way, with love & support & care for your Dad! You & your husband can take pride in cherishing those memories & the truly loving thought they'll contain! Your Dad appreciated all that you did & his is all that really counts.Go ahead & vent, you have every right.

---

Janet, Mom/caregiver of peritoneal survivor dx 12/05

Diane- Reading this post makes me furious at your "brothers" and I use that term loosely. Knowing the love and care you took taking care of your Dad, it makes me sick to hear about the ungrateful B A S T A R D S getting anything from your father's estate. As a fellow caregiver, I KNOW how difficult it is to have any semblance of a life without everything revolving around what our loved ones need. To think that they offered no help at all, yet take great pleasure in divying up the spoils..... well, I wonder who would be there for them if Meso was to strike them. Not to wish this on anyone, but if they could only feel what your Dad went though without them even pretending to care, well maybe then their tune would be different. You, on the other hand, whether they hate you or not for it, deserve anything and everything of your Father's, anything that you want. They deserve exactly what they put into his care-NOTHING. I wish you peace, and hope your life calms down and you can begin the rest of your life happy and serene. Stay strong Mike

---

Mike, Partner/Caregiver of Lisa, dx 3/06 peritoneal mesothelioma

Diane
I'm so sorry you have to go through something like this with your brothers. There are times I'm glad I don't have siblings. Some siblings aren't worth having. Your brothers have shown their self absorption and self interest. Just what have they given at anytime. Your father knew what he was doing.

---

HUGS
bonnie
Peritoneal survivor 10 YEARS