Hi Everyone,
I wanted to share that this morning my Dad was officially admitted to the VA Hospital. It is a beautiful facility with an outstanding reputation. He is all tucked into his room, and after a discussion with his onc. they have adjusted his pain medication, and he is comfortable. With comfort, I have to accept an increase in confusion, but I will choose that for him over all that pain. Tomorrow I can decorate his room with his favorite things from home. In his lucid moments, I can tell he is proud to be there. His time in the military was some of the best of his life, and he gets to re visit that now. I am starting to feel good about my decision.
At least now, I now he is safe, and getting the best care. I hope fate will be kind to us, and this last part of life will be gentle, and filled with love.
Diane

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Diane
Caregiver of Thomas (my Dad,82)
Pleural epithelial meso
dx 11/10
Our battle ended March 16, 2012. Together.

I'm so glad to see this Diane. My prayers that your hopes are answered & this time will be filled with love & comfort & ease for you & your Dad.

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Janet, Mom/caregiver of peritoneal survivor dx 12/05

Hi Diane, I am so glad for your dad and especially for you that he was admitted to the VA hospital. I know, as many others also do, that it breaks your heart to see your loved one have any of the symptoms caused by this meso or any other disease. I am so glad his meds are controlling pain.

Even when you think he's not lucid, just keep talking to him when you're there. He probably gets so much comfort just hearing your voice. Whatever your choice to read, some favorite bible verses, a book, read aloud to him if he seems to be dozing --- he'll love hearing the familiarity of your voice even if he is going in and out of sleep or just dozing.

I was fortunate enough to be able to care for Marty at home until the end of his life (except for brief stay in hosp and one hospice house for a week upon leaving hosp --- supposed to be able to rehab there from surgery following fall and broken hip ... anyhow, like said, fortunate enough to get him back home and have another 5 months with him. I CANNOT CARRY A TUNE, but even so bcz it was just Marty and me, and he sleeping, I sang some hymns that were my favs ... and I'd just talk to him, and one time ended up crying and awakened him. When I saw him awake, I said, I'm OK, I was just sitting here telling you how much I love you and how much I'm going to really, really miss you and that's why I'm crying.

For a long time, I would not let Marty see my cry, then one day I decided to tell him just bcz he didn't see me cry, didn't mean that I don't but was trying to hide it from him. Told him I was going to go ahead and let some tears show, bcz they were bcz of the dread of losing him to death.

Diane, I am so glad you are the wonderful daughter to your dad and have him in a safe place, getting the best care. I pray the Lord in His mercy will spare you having to see any really rough times, and I truly believe the time will be filled with LOVE bcz of the undying love you feel and show toward your dad. How could he do anything but love you so much in return. Lois

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Lois, Poolboy's mermaid
Marty was stage 3/4 - pleural meso 3/9/07
fought valiantly 27 months
gone to Heaven June 16, 2009

Hi Diane, very good news indeed. I would suggest that when you decorate put a good size picture of your dad from a time when he was in good health and captures his essence. This helps others to see past the illness and recognize him for who he trully is and that the physical state he is currently in is just that a physical state not the true measure of the man that he is. Mary

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Mary Hesdorffer, NP
Medical Liaison, Mesothelioma Foundation

Those are beautiful words, Mary. I'm going to do just that. Thats a great idea for everyone involved in his care.

And thank you everyone once again, for the kind words and support. Sometimes I get to feeling guilty that I couldn't have done more to keep him home. I wish there were more Lois in me. I envy her courage and strength taking care of her Marty the way she did.

Diane

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Diane
Caregiver of Thomas (my Dad,82)
Pleural epithelial meso
dx 11/10
Our battle ended March 16, 2012. Together.

Sweet, sweet Diane --- thank you for your comment giving me recognition for caring for Marty. Honey, I'm a lot older than you, and maybe bcz of some of the events of my life, God used to give me the strength and knowledge to fight and care for dear, precious Marty. You have done such a wonderful, wonderful job of fighting for your dad, and without any assistance from your siblings. Be proud of yourself. We caretakers are a special breed! I was 'TOUGH' on you when you were new on the board, but it did not mean I did not care about you. I hope you are taking care of yourself emotionally ... that meso takes more of a toll on us caretakers than we even realize. Love and a hug, Diane ... truly! from Lois

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Lois, Poolboy's mermaid
Marty was stage 3/4 - pleural meso 3/9/07
fought valiantly 27 months
gone to Heaven June 16, 2009